apologize.

I must apologize for my foul attitude/behavior these past two weeks. My uncharacteristic moods were brought to my attention by several people over a few weeks, so long that I could not blame it on a certain time of month.

I choose to work 70 hour weeks, and it is not the amount of time spent working that has taken its toll, but rather the working conditions. A fairly stress-free full-time job has turned into an extremely stressful job these past few weeks. I work hard four times out of the year. My job caters to the public, and it seems the public is never satisfied. It is never black or white, right or wrong. My part-time job has become a zoo. Three newly hired technicians, two of which are foreigners. It has been madness day in and day out.

My patience level has been slim to none. Growing up, you are always told there is no such thing as a stupid question. Once grown up, you realize by that the before mentioned statement only applies during the years of growth, when you still have much to learn. As an adult, the overwhelming number of inquisitive idiots do, in fact, ask stupid questions. One every once in awhile is okay to ignore, but one every hour of every day begins to make you wish a meteor fell on each idiot's head upon completion of each stupid question.

Miscarriage. Abortion. Suicide. Death. Never in my wildest dreams would I have ever thought I would be personally involved with so many people dealing with these situations during my life. In my opinion, these are some of the most difficult challenges one can face in life, and I envy those who know of no such thing. No one can ever really know how it feels until you, yourself, experience it. And even at that, it differs for everyone. I can only hope that I have and will do everything I can.

Eight years younger than me, my sister is one of the closest people to me. She recently went off to college for her freshman year. If I would have shed a tear any time this year, it would have been the day we moved her in. I miss her more than words could ever say. We grew extremely close over the past three years and though like night and day, we seem to relate very well to each other. She is one of the most kind hearted and good natured people I know. I wish her the best in college and hope she overcomes her current struggles.

No excuses. Not a justification. Just 'cause. Forgive me.